What do you call an academic trucker? A roads scholar.
What kind of disease do academics in the 1850s get? Scholar
In what academic subject is the Zerg most accomplished? LINGuistics
Academic success is only important to a certain degree
An academic who studies satanism, aka a philucifer.
Why do cannibals attending university only eat the head, the buttocks, and the genitals?
Because they’re so skull-ass-dick!
I’m angling for an A in Geometry.
Good principals have all their faculties intact.
Geography is world-class.
I’ve got so much school spirit, it’s spooky.
Initially, I was just a little nervous about English, but now I’m past tense.
You’re so bright, your teachers will have to wear shades.
Hope nothing lessons your enthusiasm for going back to school.
I hope you find a group of friends who clique with you.
School starts this autumn – make sure you don’t fall behind
What does the cafeteria serve after school hours? After school specials!
What do fish study in school? Algebra.
My wife asked if people wearing camo was big when I was in school.
A buffalo dropped his boy off at school and said... Bison
I asked my son how he did on his school report about Canada He said he got an "eh".
My daughter told me she saw a deer on the way to school.
I failed my medical school entrance exam last week, thanks to nerves.
Is it o.k. to start drinking as soon as the kids are at school...
Why did a pirate drop out of school early? he had seven c's
What did the father buffalo say to his son when he left for school? Bison
What do Father Christmas's little helpers learn at school? The elf-abet
Why did the horticulturist go to night school? To learn thyme management
What do you get when you go to an emo school? Education.
Beauty School would actually be very easy to procrastinate in Because it has make-up exams.
For all the time they spend in school, you'd think that fish are really smart.
I heard that the jalapeño finally finished school. He is now known as Dr. Pepper
The woman in charge of our local primary school has decided to resign.
A son tells his Dad he wants to win the limbo contest at his school.
I went to the Med school library to get a book on abdominal pain
Sherlock, what kind of school is this? Elementary, my dear Watson
My son’s learning about Buddhism in school, so when he’s around I make Nirvana jokes
They say the first-year university is difficult, but students actually sophomore in their second year.
My risqué Ph.D. philosophy thesis, ‘The Metaphysics of Raw Sewage’, was received within crud duality.
My pet eagle is proficient in sports, music, academics, and work You could say that he's a Talon-ted bird
What did the sarcastic academic say when asked if he could name a single German philosopher? “No, I Kant”
My high school bully still takes my lunch money. But on the upside, he makes great Subway sandwiches!
How did the ophthalmology student decide which school to go to? He chose the one with the most pupils!
A guy went to class on a test day dressed in a feline outfit; while his prof was blabbing about academic integrity the guy said.
My academic advisor keeps encouraging me to drop out. Thanks to him, I’m soon graduating from the Sky Diving school.